Consider Chris, child of God. In her search for a personal God, Chris soon grew weary of the burden she called "my soul's affliction". She described her early "search for God" as a spiritual endeavor. She searched for a spiritual God with whom she expected nothing less than "spiritual intimacy". She believes the "weight of my affliction grew heavier when my search took on a curious twist."
Frustrated in her efforts to find the God she sought, Chris ceased her search for spiritual intimacy with her personal God. She felt the God she searched for was not her God anymore. Instead of seeking spiritual intimacy with her personal god, she decided that she could only be satisfied with the physical knowledge of "the entity you call God", one she could experience with at least one of her three-dimensional five senses.
The search for God often takes us in directions that do not encourage us in our efforts to try to build an intimate relationship with the God we hope to find. In Chris' search, she nurtured a need to "isolate the entity you call God", by identifying God's relative time and space location. She felt she could not believe in "the entity you call God" until she understood when, where, and how the entity we call God exists. "How can I," she demanded, "worship a God I cannot see, hear, or feel? How else can I know that God exists?"
Chris was resolute in trying to confirm that God exists only by identifying God's physical location. Instead, she came closer to drafting a position so debilitating that it denied her the joy and comfort she sought. She began a one-way trek by embracing one of the opinions she had head, that "man, earth, and the universe we perceive exists only in the mind of our cosmic creator."
She reasoned that "the infinity we perceive or expect is a reflection of the Cosmic Creator's infinite mind in which we exist. "Our entire existence is an invention of the Cosmic Creator's infinite imagination". Other beliefs were given birth by that first premise. Chris accepted the conjecture that the world we perceive is concrete only to ourselves. She decided that every new found truth, every new unexplained phenomenon occurred not because humans in our wisdom and intellectual growth had discovered it, but because her creator, in whose mind we exist, had imagined it at the time of discovery.
Such assumptions could explain for her the sudden appearances and disappearances of UFOs. In Chris' universe, everything we perceive and do is a function of her creator's need to be entertained and amused. She believed a space ship could be introduced into our universe. Like us, it came from her creator's imagination. Someone, even if only a few, in our little imagined world sees and hears it because it is as real as we are. Imagined by her creator, real to humans, then gone. Her God giveth and her God taketh away. We are scared or perplexed and her God is amused. Something concrete to someone in our world had come and vanished. Not once, but with as much regularity as her creator deems necessary. And when her creator becomes bored with such things , he turns to other human responses for amusement.
Instead of a God with whom she could she could share an intimate relationship that provided mortal comfort, Chris had envisioned and created a god that is incapable of intimacy. In defeat, Chris proclaimed that "surely, wherever the entity you call God is, He must have laughed at my pathetic attempts to unveil him". And in the wake of that "laugh", Chris often parodied herself with a mocking refrain that did not amuse her: "My God! My God! Why have you forsaken me. No. That was for someone else. Better I should say My God! My God! Why do you hide your face from me?"